
I Found Out That Others Felt the Same Thing I Was Feeling

I Found Out That Others Felt the Same Thing I Was Feeling
For many years I often wondered if I was normal. I felt guilty for the abuse, as if I made it happen. It wasn’t something I talked about, and I wanted to just place it in a safe place. Letting those feelings lye in hiding, not thinking it was hurting my life anymore.
When I first learned about Saprea, I thought do I really need to go? But, then I told myself maybe it will help me to feel normal again. So, I filled out the application to go and waited till I heard from them.
I was scared and excited at the same time when I got the call with a date I would be going. This is really happening!!
Once I stepped foot in the door I knew this was going to be a great experience, and I was right. The staff made us feel safe. Every detail was thought of with love. Going through the classes and off-site group therapies taught me I am normal. I learned I wasn’t weird or abnormal in what I felt. I found out to be aware of my surroundings and what triggers were and how to deal with them. In all these years, I just hid things back in my mind so I wouldn’t think of the sexual abuse. I found out that others felt the same thing I was feeling. I wasn’t alone anymore.
I was able to release those feelings by writing what happened to me. They are in my journal for the one day I will burn those memories. More importantly I have gotten my life back, I am stronger now.
From walking into the Saprea Retreat, my life has changed. I now see my beauty and have the confidence that comes with that beauty. I am confident I will be okay. My life will have meaning. We are Warrior Sisters! It’s an amazing feeling to reclaim hope.
-Paulette, Survivor