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Saprea > Survivor Stories > Struggled with Not Being Enough

SURVIVOR STORIES

Struggled with Not Being Enough

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I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. My experience happened 60 years ago when I was four years old. The power of shame, guilt, embarrassment, and low self-esteem has controlled me my entire life. 

For my entire life I have struggled with not being enough. I felt like I had to be perfect to fit in. I have used dissociation my entire life. I have been frozen in time and not been able to move. 

In 2017, I had a friend tell me about Saprea Retreat. I kept thinking about applying to go to the retreat and finally contacted them and signed up to go. I became very anxious after I signed up. The day finally came for me to attend and I was anxious about meeting the other women. 

After I got settled in I met some of the most amazing women who were much younger than myself. I formed such a strong bond with these women that no one can break. Attending the retreat was the first time I spoke about my sexual abuse. They truly understood and really listened to me. 

I am so grateful I had the opportunity of attending the Saprea Retreat. It taught me how to truly love myself and ask for what I need. I learned some new tools and strategies to help me on my journey. I have a long way to go to heal myself since I have just begun my journey. 

-Jenefer, Survivor