I began writing this poem a few months before attending the Saprea Retreat. I’d hit a block and had been stuck for weeks. Just days after returning from retreat, I completed the poem.

Saprea changed my life. I’ll forever be grateful.

The Sacrificial Lamb

I once was a little lamb,
Whose hair was dark as night;
My parents forced the church on me and
Told me “Do what’s right”

Don’t fear my precious little lamb
For God is love and light
He knows your heart and hears your prayers
He’ll always hold you tight

With tear-stained cheeks, I bow my head
And plead with all my might
The monster under my bed is real
Please help me win this fight

The little lamb was sacrificed
Her innocence no more
“She’ll be ok,” her family said
“She chose this life,” they swore

As she grows, that little lamb
Becomes the blackest sheep
She’s a lost cause, they sigh in despair
She’s dug that hole too deep

No one would save her but herself
As she cried herself to sleep
She knew the battle up ahead
Was long, and slow, and steep

They say what doesn’t kill you
Only makes you stronger
I say my trauma doesn’t get
To take that credit any longer

With sheer determination
To take back the life he stole
She clawed and she climbed
Until she emerged her true self. Whole.

– Amber, Survivor