Tammy, a survivor of child sexual abuse, attended The Haven Retreat and knows that she is beautiful.

I Know Who I Am and I Am Beautiful

For 26 years I kept my secret. I kept my shame. I never believed I was worthy of anything. Love, friendship, acceptance.

Then I saw a video of a stranger sharing her “fight song” and I realized, I didn’t have to live like that anymore. That video pushed me to take my first step in the journey to healing. Fast forward one year and I’m still taking steps. Some forward, some backward, some sideways, but still taking one step at a time. One moment at a time.

Last week, I went to the Saprea Retreat. I’ve tried to figure out how to express what happened there, but the words don’t do it justice. I have NEVER felt the ability to let my guard down so quickly with ANYONE, let alone a group of strangers. But that’s the thing, they weren’t strangers, they are sisters.

Yes, it was an ugly thing that brought us to that place, but there, in that house, the scars became beautiful. They became reminders that what tried to kill me, DID NOT succeed.

I can never express how much I appreciate the time I had there, the friends I made, the truths I discovered. All I can say really is that now I KNOW who I am and that I am beautiful even with those scars.

I’m a palm tree, so let the storm rage, because my roots go deep.

-Tammy, Survivor

Interested in Attending Saprea Retreat?

Woman sitting in an office smiling as she writes

Positive Affirmations to Reclaim Hope

For survivors of child sexual trauma, there can be a lot of shame and negative self-talk. That voice in your head can be pretty mean at times. An important part of healing and reclaiming hope is to be able to change that negative voice into your head into a more loving and positive voice.

One way to do that is through positive affirmations. Positive affirmations are sentences that you say to yourself to remind you of how amazing you are, how far you’ve come, and how capable you are to continue on your healing journey. Here are five ways to come up with our own positive affirmations:

01
START WITH A LIST
Make a list of positive things you want to see happen in your life. Be as vague or specific as you want, just write down the first things that come to mind.
02
CHOOSE ONE TO REPRESENT EACH ASPECT OF YOUR LIFE
Think of categories like Work, Family, Personal, Physical, Spiritual, etc. Find the most important aspects of your life and come up with one sentence from your list for each category.
03
WRITE THEM DOWN
Put them someplace where you'll see them and read them every day. The bathroom mirror may be a good place.
04
SAY THEM OUT LOUD
It may feel a little awkward at first but say them out loud with conviction. You’ll be surprised how empowering they can be.
05
KEEP THEM UP-TO-DATE
If one of yours is “I exercise for 30 minutes every day because my body deserves it” and you’ve made that a consistent habit, then replace it with a new one that expands on that.

Here are a few examples of positive declarations to get you started:

  • I love myself and I am amazing.

  • I am good at my job and am paid what I am worth.

  • I am a great mom and my children are fortunate to have me.

  • I have the strength to do the right thing.

  • I am grateful for this day and the many possibilities it affords.

  • I am a powerful and resourceful woman.

  • I am attracting positive and healthy people into my life.

  • I view challenges as opportunities to increase my wisdom and strength.

  • I can manage triggers in a healthy way.

  • I behave in ways that promote my health every day.

If you practice your positive declarations consistently, along with viewing your vision board and your future vision statement, you’ll be sending a consistent positive message to the limbic system in your brain (the part that drives behavior). You’ll be amazed at the results you see when you practice a little more positivity.

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Maggie, a survivor of child sexual abuse, attended The Haven Retreat and her secret no longer has power.

My Secret No Longer Has Power

I am a sexual abuse SURVIVOR.

A few years ago to say those words brought so much shame and embarrassment, I thought if I could run away and put my childhood trauma to rest and never think about it again I was doing good. I have always gone to therapy and different counselors but nothing seemed to help. Until Saprea found me.

I had been working on my issues for a long time but never really had any aha moments until them. After going to the Saprea Retreat, I found others who felt like they were broken too. I discovered I wasn’t alone.

Yes, I was sexually abused, but I won’t let that define who I am. I am worthy of love, loyalty, honesty, and all the other amazing miracles that happen when you surrender to your fears and learn that there are other ways to cope and thrive.

My life now is changing so quickly since opening up. I am starting the process to begin a peer trauma group in my town. I am also hoping to be able to go to schools and educate children.

Once the secret is out it has no power over you. I have found such peace inside myself that I just want to share it with the world.

-Maggie, Survivor

Interested in Attending Saprea Retreat?

Rena, a survivor of child sexual abuse, attended The Haven Retreat and is a warrior.

I Am Not a Victim. I Am a Warrior.

I only opened up about my abuse last year. I always felt so ashamed, disgusting, and that I wouldn’t be believed. I was abused by someone for many years, someone who was supposed to love and protect me.

Before I received the email to say that I had been selected for the Saprea Retreat, I had just finished a six-week group therapy course here in the UK. I did not know where to turn to next. The email came at just the right time for me.

I was petrified to make the journey to Utah. I was traveling on my own from the UK to a country I have never been to. It was so daunting, but I knew I had to go. And I did it!

I am no longer a victim, I am a survivor, I am a warrior! I’ve met wonderful ladies at the retreat, who will forever be my friends. I felt safe and comfortable. Being the only person there from England, I felt so nervous. But everyone made me feel so welcomed.

I have been given the tools I need to continue with my healing journey and for that, I will forever be grateful.

-Rena, Survivor

Interested in Attending Saprea Retreat?